The most depressing day of the year

Yesterday, we had to put our dear sweet fur baby to sleep. Our cat Socks got sick and decided to stop eating around Christmas time and never really ate again. She would drink a little water, but mostly just got skinnier and weaker, and more miserable. We took her to the Vet just after New years and paid $300 for the vet to say that her blood work was good, and that she looked fine other than her weight and a pretty bad urinary tract infection. This wouldn't explain why she had stopped eating, and that we could spend A LOT more money to do x-rays or ultrasounds and such to see if she had cancer or something. She was only about 10 yrs old. That's not really all that old for a cat. It about broke my heart that we couldn't afford the tests, or the subsequent treatments. We decided to go ahead and treat the infection and to give her some steroids that would help increase her appetite. It didn't seem to help at all. She still didn't eat. The other day I noticed that not only would she not come out from under the bed (where she had been hiding for the last month) but now one of her eyes was dilated, while the other was not. This is not a good sign. DH and I decided that we needed to have her put to sleep. We just couldn't bear to watch her suffer any longer.

It's funny how something as small as a cat can tear at your heart so much, and how life continues to go on even when they are gone. I have yet to empty out her food dish and her litter box, but I need to do that today since it's trash day. I guess what is really odd is that I teared up and cried when we took her in, and cried when I thought about it before hand, I'm really ok with it all right now. I think that it's good that I believe in an afterlife for all things, including animals. It also makes me feel better to know that she is no longer suffering. It was a really good opportunity to discuss death and what happened to our cat with our children. It sure means a lot more when the thing dying isn't some abstract critter or person on TV, but is a real life loved one.

All of this is incredibly ironic since yesterday Monday the 22nd according to Wiki was named "Blue Monday" the most depressing day of the year" by Dr. Cliff Arnall. This was based on the time since Christmas, the lack of following through with New Years resolutions, the inability to pay bills, etc. None of which included the loss of a dear family pet, but I think it's incredibly appropriate.